SOUTH ASIA

So.

I've been promising this thing for about a month. At first, I just didn't know how I was going to do it. Obviously, I can't really talk about the country; giving geographical details defeats the purpose of having a security policy, but not giving geographical details makes it difficult for me to tell a story. I can't explain the context, so the story makes little sense.

I decided to just do a picture post. But which pictures? I have about 800 from which to choose, and even if I could limit it, I have the problem of context again.

Then I thought about just not doing a post about South Asia at all. It eliminates the security problem entirely, and I can stop agonizing about how to do it. But that's not fair to you, because it really was a good trip, and I did see some incredible things.

Finally, as I was talking to my dear friend Beka, and we were discussing our respective failures to update our blogs, I was forced to acknowledge that my reticence was explained by a root problem.

I haven't come home, yet.

Physically, I've been home since the fifteenth of April. But mentally, emotionally, maybe even spiritually, I'm still standing on top of the guest house, looking out over the capital.


On every trip I take, I ask God to teach me something, to reveal Himself in a new way. Sometimes, I'm given a verse or a subject to study even before I leave. Often, there is a single moment of clarity, such as when I was in Sierra Leone back in 2008. God is always present wherever I am, but there is always one of those "Ah-ha!" moments when I suddenly realize my purpose for being on the trip.

I don't know what that is for South Asia.

It's painful to admit that. I have prayed about it, but I don't know what else to do except wait. And I hate waiting. I suppose that's my lesson this time around.

So, just the facts this time around. I went to South Asia with my boss so we could see the ministries there and gather stories to share throughout OMS. We saw a girls' school, micro-loan recipients, evangelism teams, churches, a baptism and discipleship training. We interviewed dozens of people, we took hundreds of pictures, and we did it all in about four days. Here's just a taste of what we saw.














I would appreciate your continued prayers for me. The past couple of months have been rough, and it's often been a matter of taking things one day (sometimes hour) at a time.

I would encourage you to head on over to Beka's blog. She writes good stuff.

And if she hasn't updated it, please point that out to her.

;D

Woe

There has been a woeful lack of updateage. I am well aware of this fact, and hereby apologize profusely. Life, alas, has been rather stressful of late. I am still trying to catch up after the trip, and now I'm headed to Pennsylvania for mission conferences. I do intend to share about South Asia. Really. It's coming.

Someday.

Actually, if you want to know about the trip, you could come to Mt. Olivet UB Church in Chambersburg on Saturday night. I will tell you all about it.

:D

Leaving on a Jet Plane (or Two or Three)

I don't think I should write blogs the night before I leave on a trip. I always end up saying something that either makes people freak out or makes them ask a lot of questions, and then I just leave it hanging. Part of me wants to do that now just to be annoying. I shall try to refrain from doing that this time. No guarantees, though.

Even worse, I'm all jittery. Everything is packed and ready, but I keep thinking I've forgotten something or worrying that I've packed all the wrong things. My mother is here to see me off, so she keeps me from really going off the deep end. It's still utterly annoying.

There are so many things I have yet to do. I'm fast approaching the point where it won't matter anymore, and I'm stuck with things the way they are.

Rawr.

I get the urge to do that every so often. I know. It's weird.

Will I sleep tonight? Should I bother trying? Our flight from New York to Tokyo is 14 hours. I don't sleep well on planes.

I had a really good conversation today with a very good friend. It was about something I've been thinking about for a while, but haven't wanted to really address because I'd have to do something about it. I think that when I get back, I'll be ready to explore things further.

And there goes that promise about not being cryptic.

Oops.

If you're wondering why this is all over the place, it's because I keep leaving it and coming back to it. This whole thing was probably written over a period of four hours.

I'm ready for this trip.

Right?

Of course.

It's cliche, but I like this song. So here you go.

Fear Not

It has been pointed out to me by well-meaning individuals that I have a tendency to a) mention something once and never bring it up again, or b) say a lot about something without actually saying anything about it.

Unfortunately for the aforementioned people, this is going to be another one of those posts.

There are exactly two things that freak me out. I'm not talking about jump-a-foot-in-the-air-because-someone-popped-out-at-you scary. I'm talking heart-in-your-throat-can't-breathe-because-of-the-panic scary.

There's not a lot I can do when faced with either of those things, but I found (rediscovered) a passage today that may help with one of them. And because I am so nice, I'm going to share it with you. (The verse, not the thing that freaks me out. Sorry.)


Then I turned to see the voice that was speaking to me, and on turning I saw seven golden lampstands, and in the midst of the lampstands one like a son of man, clothed with a long robe and with a golden sash around his chest. The hairs of his head were white, like white wool, like snow. His eyes were like a flame of fire, his feet were like burnished bronze, refined in a furnace, and his voice was like the roar of many waters. In his right hand he held seven stars, from his mouth came a sharp two-edged sword, and his face was like the sun shining in full strength.

When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead. But he laid his right hand on me, saying, "Fear not, I am the first and the last, and the living one. I died, and behold I am alive forevermore, and I have the keys of Death and Hades."

Revelation 1:12-18

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

I've thought for awhile about what this post would look like. There's a lot running around in my head right now. My natural inclination would be to follow the general thoughts of everyone else in the world around this time of year. I've been thinking a lot about what this new year means, and the changes I would like to make in my life. Some things are incredibly superficial. For example, I always change my signature sometime around my birthday. Nothing drastic, but it keeps things fresh. Some changes, however, are a little more drastic.

It is those changes that are making my brain hurt. They are good changes, things I should have done years ago in some cases. But change is disruptive. It breaks up old routines. It forces us to do things we've never done before. It can take us to unexpected places.

You could make an argument that all of the things I just listed can actually be good. But hey - I'm not exactly a glass-half-full kind of girl. I tend to see any kind of change as ThatWhichMustBeAvoided. Routine makes me happy. New things make me nervous. I hate surprises.

But there is a saying that I have taken to heart recently: If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you have always got.

I'm tired of sameness.

I'm tired of being terrified to take the next step. You might think it is odd that I would be writing about this when I've already taken a huge step and made a gigantic change by moving to Greenwood and becoming a missionary. But as far as my everyday life goes, not a lot has changed. Frankly, that's kind of sad.

Does this mean I will not protest the new Facebook profiles? No. They look ridiculous.

But it does mean that I will be looking for opportunities to switch things up a bit. (No doubt complaining the entire time, but if you think that's going to change, you are dreaming.)

What has inspired this new train of thought? Two things. A) My birthday. I will be turning 25 on January 16. That's one quarter of a century that I've been on this planet. What do I have to show for my 25 years? A snark factor that is off the charts, and a cynical streak a mile wide. I'd like to think I can contribute slightly more than that in the future.

B) My father's retirement. My father is a great man who has given more than 40 years to ministry and will doubtless continue in a number of capacities to contribute to the spiritual growth of those around him. With him as an example, how can I not strive for more?

Speaking of... the retirement party was lovely.


There were quite a few laughs (in our family, how could there not be?), but we had a generally awesome time. Not in the least because of the very excellent video I made about my father's life. Humility? Pfft... I put a lot of freaking work into that thing.


Anyway, this man is essentially starting a new career at the ripe old age of XX. (Sorry for the edit. Suffice to say, he's not a spring chicken anymore.)

EDIT: Three things. I forgot this one briefly, but am adding it now. I've been reading Sarah Young's devotional book "Jesus Calling." As soon as I read the entry for January 1, I knew I had to share it. Imagine Jesus saying these words to you:

"Come to me with a teachable spirit, eager to be changed. A close walk with me is a life of continual newness. Do not cling to old ways as you step into a new year. Instead, seek My Face with an open mind, knowing that your journey with Me involves being transformed by the renewing of your mind. As you focus your thoughts on Me, be aware that I am fully attentive to you. I see you with a steady eye, because My attention span is infinite. I know and understand you completely; My thoughts embrace you in everlasting Love. I also know the plans I have for you: plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Give yourself fully to this adventure of increasing attentiveness to My Presence."

Yeah. Try ignoring THAT.

What does all this mean? Well, I'm not really sure. I know, I know, I'm not the first person to talk about change without contextualizing. I have some very definite ideas in my head, and I'm working on incorporating them into reality. That's about as detailed as it is going to get.

One final note:


Beka and I are holding copies of the very first Outreach magazine to which we contributed. Our magazines are open to our respective articles. (Don't worry. It isn't actually backwards when you open it.) If you would like to receive a copy of Outreach, you have a couple of options. Go to the website (link -----> or below) and download it, subscribe (by going to the website (------->) or contact me and I'll send you a copy.

One final final note: Because of you beautiful people, my blog is in the top twenty sites for sending people to the One Mission Society website. Keep it up!

EDIT: Oh yeah! I forgot that I added a new feature to my blog. I've called it "Formative Books on my Journey Through Life (Besides the Bible)". Essentially, it is a list of books that have been instrumental in shaping my mental state. Read those books, and you will understand me so. much. better.

Day Zero

T minus whatever and counting...

I've realized something important. As I was packing my bag, I kept thinking about all the things I was forgetting - mosquito netting, bug repellant, plain t-shirts, skirts, sunscreen ... the list went on. But I'm not forgetting them - I just don't need them.

I'm not used to packing for Europe. But I love it!

It also made me realize that while my heart has revised the definition of 'missions,' my head has yet to get the message. Or is it the other way around? Either way, I'm starting to think a little bit more about the idea of missions.

In other news, I think I may have stumbled on my calling while I was getting ready this morning. It's been in the back of my mind for awhile now, but I had a moment of perfect clarity when my future was laid out before me. It was like being in Africa all over again. And Beka, we were right - it's terrifying, exhilarating and definitely not something I'd have chosen for myself. This is going to take real work to accomplish.

Now I'm nervous. If all this is happening even before I get on the plane, what is waiting for me in Spain?

EDIT: I've just read this thing again, and even I think it makes very little sense. I'll try to clarify when I've had a chance to consult with Dad.