Many Sons Had Father Abraham

I've heard a lot about Abraham lately.

My daily Bible reading took me through Abraham's story. 

The sermon on Sunday was all about Father Abraham.

And chapel today was about Abraham's journey from Harran.

I've heard this story a thousand times. 

But maybe I should be paying attention so I can learn something new.

There's a lot to learn from Abraham. First, there's his life of faith. We really don't know what he was doing for the first 75 years of his life. But I have to imagine that he had to at least be a little attuned to God's will and voice in order to listen so readily when God told him to do something so incredible at such a late stage in life.

But then Abraham (or Abram still at this point) makes conscious decisions to be stupid. He told at least two rulers that Sarai was his sister. And don't give me that crap about it being technically true. Those are the kinds of lies we reassure ourselves are okay to tell because technically, they're true. Technically, you're still being an ass.

And then there's the whole business with Lot. Abram was incredibly fair and patient with Lot, even as Lot picked up all of Abram's worst habits and few of his good ones. And Abram still rescued Lot, and even made an amazing friend out of the deal!

One of the things I like most about Abram is that he wasn't afraid to ask God questions. When God made the covenant, Abram was all about the details. He knew he was getting a sweet deal, and he made sure it was legally binding.

And then there's Ishmael. I, personally, believe that Abram was totally just being a man here. Should he have consulted God about what Sarai proposed? Absolutely. But he didn't. Because he's a man, and a nubile young woman was being offered to him on a platter. Or in a tent, but whatever. He's a man. And he totally copped out when it turned out that this was a really bad idea. (Shocking.) He couldn't help but love the kid, but I think he also later recognized that Ishmael was a constant reminder that he hadn't fully trusted God. (I think this is why he doesn't argue when God calls Isaac his only son.)

God wanted the legal business to go both ways. So He tells Abraham to undergo circumcision. Now, on Sunday, my pastor totally threw parents and the internet under the bus on what exactly this meant. I'm certainly not going into detail, either. But at 99 years of age, Abraham had to do a little snip-snip procedure. Later, when reading the story of Dinah, we learn that Schechem and all his friends were still in such pain three days after undergoing the same procedure that they didn't notice Simeon and Levi hacking them into even more pieces. (Sorry.) There's a reason it's done to children only a few days old now.

After God reminds Abraham again of the promised child, He tells Abraham that he's going to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah. And Abraham pleads not once, not twice, but six times for mercy if a few faithful can be found. I don't know if Abraham thinks Lot has been preaching or what, but I do know that only four people walked away from Sodom and only three made it to the mountains. Most people would consider one question to be pressing his luck, but this mattered so much to Abraham that he presumed to speak before the Lord six times to ask if He was sure this was a good idea.

Finally, at 100 years of age, God fulfilled his promise through Isaac. Abraham waited more than 20 years for the fulfillment of this promise. Did he wait well? Not always. But he did wait. Sometimes, God waits a really long time before giving us our heart's desire. Sometimes, as in the case of Abraham becoming a great nation, we never see the results of a promise. But we still have to have faith that it's going to happen.

There's one more reason to admire Abraham. He had enjoyed several years with his child, teaching him trades and telling Isaac that he was a fulfillment of God's promise. And then one night, God told Abraham to take his only son, whom he loved, and sacrifice him as a burnt offering. The Bible moves on in the story to the next morning, but I've always wondered what the rest of that night was like for Abraham. Did he question it? Did he consider disobedience? I don't know. But the next morning, he took Isaac, the boy who God had promised would be the start of a great nation, and they traveled to the place of the sacrifice. Hebrews tells us that Abraham believed God would raise Isaac from the dead, but there is still a huge amount of faith that goes into this? Even if he did kill Isaac, and God raised him from the dead, Abraham would still have to live with the fact that he'd killed his son. That's huge.

But of course, Abraham passed the test. Whatever mistakes he'd made, he ultimately trusted God more than anything. And maybe that's the lesson to be learned. No matter how much we think we have things under control, our first impulse should be to trust God and inquire of Him what our next step should be. 

Project Runway and the Secret Underbelly of Missions

(I started writing this last year, before the Christmas video went out. Try to enjoy it in the manner in which it was intended.)

For reasons known to me and a few others, I've been binge-watching episodes of Project Runway.

Don't get me wrong, I like the show. When it first aired, it was something new and a little edgy. It gave us a peek behind the curtain of fashion design, and while I had never known that that was something I wanted, I realized pretty quickly that it was fairly entertaining television.

It's also on cable, so I only watched when I was at my parent's house or, lately, when they have full episodes online.

Project Runway has become something of a behemoth. A version of it has aired in more than 20 countries. It has launched the careers of a few famous people and given some less famous people 15 minutes of fame. The show has gone through a few iterations, but the basic idea is the same: several aspiring fashion designers compete to win various challenges and ultimately to win a chance to launch their own line of fashion.

Season 14 began airing in August 2015. I've sort of paid more attention this year, partly because of the aforementioned reasons, but also because they found some truly ... interesting ... designers this year. Seriously, I don't like competition shows because a lot of people lose, and then they get very emotional. But I have actively cheered when some of these designers got cut. They are terrible people.

Anyway, I was talking about one of the episodes with a coworker, and she told me I should write a blog post about it because it is reflective of some things in the mission world we tend to ignore.

So here goes.

First, a recap of the episode.

It started pretty normally. Heidi Klum (the host) and Tim Gunn (the mentor) were preparing to present the new challenge to the designers. But first, they divided the group into two teams. Team challenge! Sometimes these go well. Sometimes not.

Anyway, there was some tension because instead of choosing teams strategically, everyone just chose their friends and roommates, leaving the one girl who has won two challenges already (and thus is known to the judges and obvi a contender) to be chosen last. Naturally, they had split into a girls team and a boys+1girl team.

Then they played paintball. I know, it doesn't make sense. But that's what happened. The twist for the challenge was that they had to create six outfits that would form a complete collection out of their jumpsuits from paintball. They also had supplemental material. That's important for later.

Right away, the guys (who I will call the blue team) started talking through their plan. There was a little dissension about what it would be, but Swapnil (who I name because his name rocks) made a very reasonable and calm argument for the 1950s. Everyone agreed. But they didn't stop there. They figured out everyone's strengths (not everyone had to create an outfit - they just had to have six, and everyone had to participate in some manner). They asked each person what they wanted to create, and then they talked about how it would fit into the collection. They decided to mostly use the jumpsuits, but asked one designer to create a common textile print that everyone could use. It took more time (they had two days), but they had a very cohesive collection, and it allowed them to focus on the design.

In contrast, the girls (the purple team). They hated the paintball jumpsuits. They hated the colors. They hated the supplemental fabric. So they decided to go for some kind of tie-dye theme. Well, four did. The other two, when they suggested coming up with a theme first, were drowned out and shot down. The purple team ruined their jumpsuit fabric. And yet, even then, they didn't sit down together to figure out a plan. They decided that everyone would design something, and then they would figure out what the common element was later. Except they wasted so much time that most of them did not have a complete outfit ready by the time their models showed up for a fitting.

Then the runway show. Blue team nailed it. The looks were fun, flirty, included a pant option, they were fashion-forward, and best of all, they fit together without being matchy-matchy. There was a gown that was just beautiful - I would wear it.

Purple team, however, was a mess. I believe the words 'amateur hour' were used. They had used a ton of the supplemental fabric instead of focusing on the jumpsuits. The colors were reminiscent of Barney the Dinosaur or an Easter egg hunt. Some outfits were obviously unfinished.

Blue team won, gown guy won, but everyone got the credit. They were a true team, even though only one person will ultimately win the game.

Purple team lost. And then it became obvious that the only thing they had collaborated on (well, four of them) was who to blame. And sure enough, it was the girl who had been picked last.

The judges were not impressed. At all. And they made that very clear. The girl they kicked out had made some weird caftan-type dress, but I'm firmly convinced that they gave her the boot mainly for her attitude. She did not take responsibility for anything that went wrong.

Auf wiedersehen indeed.

So. What does this have to do with missions?

Honestly, it's a lesson that is not unique to missions. It's something that could happen anywhere. But I used that title as clickbait. I'm sorry. I'll do my best to tie this to missions.

All too often, missionaries look a lot like the purple team. We all start with pretty much the same thing, and while we hopefully don't hate it, we do have a lot of different ways of spreading the news.

Missionaries are, somewhat out of necessity, but also by nature, independent people. What other type of person leaves home to go somewhere unfamiliar in order to tell possibly hostile people about Jesus? It attracts a very specific type of person.

Unfortunately, that type of person tends to be a "Let's Go." There are four types of these "Let" people. (I checked.) They are: Let's Go, Let's Be Careful, Let's Stay Together, and Let Me Help You. They fit into the four basic personality types, the four humors, Meyers-Briggs, whatever you want to call it. People tend to have a dominant type, and then a supporting type. Some naturally work together, and some are in a bit of conflict.

Let's Go people tend to have great ideas and a lot of enthusiasm. They want to start now and worry about details later. And that's okay - to a point. Because if your organization is made up entirely of Let's Go individuals, then you will soon find yourself with a prospering business that has to shut down because someone forgot to pay taxes. Or you'll own a piece of property in an economically diminished neighborhood that can't be rezoned because no one read the fine print.

Not to name specific examples of ministries I know.

One of the things I look for in any new business, mission, or investment is sustainability. And all too often, sustainability gets obscured by vision. We see what could be. We have a goal, and we have an amazing idea for how to achieve that goal. But if we don't talk to each other about that goal, if we don't agree on a means, if we go into something with a built-in out, the vision is going to be just that - a figment of the imagination that never had legs to carry it to fruition.

There are a lot of things we can take from this particular episode of Project Runway. We can realize that the best team contains a combination of the four types of "Let" people. We can realize that a plan doesn't have to take forever to create, so we can still meet a deadline. We can realize that trying to find meaning in something after the fact usually ends up in a big fat goose egg. And we can realize that experience and wise counsel are worth their weight in gold.

Don't fall into the trap of Let's Go. Or don't only have those people on your team. Build a solid foundation, and the rest will follow. I'm pretty sure Jesus said something to that effect.

Incidental #1, the girl who was picked last won the entire season. Would I wear what she created? Some of it. Did she deserve it? Yes.

Incidental #2, I'm a Let's Be Careful. But my supporting type is Let's Go. Naturally, I think this is the best type. Also, I don't really care if everyone gets along. Helpers are good, though.

Incidental #3, I am fully aware that there is a bit of bias in this post. As I come from a specific type, I find other types difficult to deal with. And just now, I read an article about what exhausts each personality type? Mine?

INTJ – Improvisation

INTJs are the ultimate planners – they ruthlessly map out how they’re going to behave in future situations and glean energy from determining the best of all possible approaches. Though they are capable of improvising when need be, the INTJ will rapidly lose energy if they must act without deliberating for a significant period of time. They are big-picture thinkers, and they need to put everything into perspective before they feel completely comfortable taking action.

Birthday Thoughts

So last Saturday, I celebrated my 30th birthday. I have been on this plant for 30 years. Three decades. 10,950 days. 282,000 hours.

In other words, a long flipping time.

I know there are some who would say that's not very long. And I suppose, relatively speaking, it's really not that long.

But it feels long to me.

I've done a lot so far in my life. I've traveled, I've studied, I've made friends, lost friends, had a few different jobs. There are a lot of things I haven't done. I've never been married, for one. I can't decide if I want that to change.

Obviously, I can't see into the future. I don't know what the next three decades holds, or even if I get three more decades. But I do know that I don't want birthdays to become just another day. They signify an achievement. By the grace of God, I've survived another year on this little round ball, and at times, I've even enjoyed it.

So if you ever hear me say that I won't be celebrating my birthday, remind me of this post.

And at some point, there had better be a surprise birthday party. 

Love Your Enemies

"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." Matthew 5:43-48 (NIV)

I don't know many people outside of TV shows who have real, personal enemies. Most of us have people who annoy us, sure, but would we go so far as to call them an enemy? And yeah, we have distant enemies - people who want to destroy us for ideological, religious, or cultural reasons. But the majority of us will never encounter these people face-to-face.

I have a tendency to ignore these verses. As time goes by, however, I'm realizing more and more why that is a really bad idea.

In many ways, this is the most radical thing Jesus ever said. And he said it at a time when Israel had a lot of enemies, and most of them lived right there with them.

I like Jesus' "you have heard" statements. There was a glut of fancy sayings going around at the time. I liken it to the Calormenes in The Chronicles of Narnia, especially in The Horse and His Boy. They were constantly sprinkling 'wise' sayings into their overly formal speech, all in an effort to convince everyone that they knew more than they really did. In reality, it was borrowed wisdom. Even now, every political speech borrows rhetoric from someone who said it better before who borrowed it from someone who probably borrowed a bastardized version of someone else's words. The Pharisees were famous for their little creeds and rules. People really had heard these things before, probably ad nauseum. 

Interestingly enough, however, as so often happens, what they heard was not what was originally said. They heard, "Love your neighbor and hate your enemy." But where does that even come from? Well, the first part comes from Leviticus 19. In the midst of God's instructions to the people of Israel was an admonition to "love your neighbor as yourself." Cool. Makes sense. But what about the rest of it?

See, the Pharisees had this nasty habit of "fixing" what they considered to be ambiguous instructions. For example, let's say God had told the people of Israel not to sit in a particular style of chair for longer than two hours. It's a good rule because any longer, and that style would screw up your back. But how to enforce something like that? Well, you tell people that that style of chair is evil, an abomination in God's eyes. Also, anyone who would own a chair like that is evil. So, we ban the chair. All because of an instruction designed to help people's posture. (Yeah, it's an extreme example, but it works.)

So, God told people to love their neighbors. Makes sense. People who live together should get along. But the opposite of love is hate. And if doing one thing is good, then following it to its natural conclusion is better, right? It's natural to have a beef with someone who is against you. Even David prayed for God to kill his enemies.

(You're about to tell me that David also smashed babies' heads against rocks. I'm fully aware. Do I completely understand it? No. But I understand some of it. Continue reading.)

The Israelites lived according to the law. The whole world lived according to the law. The law is black and white. Do this. Do not do that. And according to the law, God is perfect. Man is not. It is entirely within God's character to instruct Joshua to wipe out the people of Canaan. They had no interest in following the law, and God knew that if they were left alive, they would corrupt his chosen people. (And guess what happened.)

The problem comes when you realize that man cannot in any way, shape, or form keep the entire law. It's impossible. We saw it time and again with Israel. They'd toe the line for a little while and then BAM - back to pursuing the world.

And then Jesus comes along with his "you heard" statements. "Look, you tried it this way," he says. "It ain't working. So let's do it the way it should be and could have been if you'd listened from the start."

And the way it should be? Grace.

Here's the thing about enemies. They are people. They see the sun, feel the rain, they live in the same world as you and I. They are human. And humans were created in the image of God. God loves them. So why can't we?

I will tell you right now, it won't make one bit of difference to most of our enemies if we love them or not. They won't care that we're praying for them. In fact, that may make them hate us even more. It might even make your friends hate you. I got into a Facebook discussion about the refugee crisis last year, and I found myself making the statement that even if I got a grenade in exchange for bread, I still had to offer it. It was a shattering realization. I had to decide if I actually believed that.

Love your enemy. The most terrifying enemy I can think of right now is ISIS. If they ever came after me or my family, could I show them love? Could I pray for them, knowing that they killed a family member or raped a daughter?

I believe there are such things as righteous wars. I believe there are certain people who are so dangerous to others that they should be stopped at whatever personal cost.

But it can't be done out of hatred. And that's why the second part of that verse is key. We're to pray for those who persecute us.

Why? Do those people stop persecuting us if we start praying for them? Does God change his mind and rescue us from certain death? It probably won't make any difference to the people doing the persecuting whether we pray for them or not. And God doesn't change his mind. Whatever needs to happen will happen.

But prayer isn't for the benefit of others. I like the way C.S. Lewis put it: "I pray because I can’t help myself. I pray because I’m helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time- waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God- it changes me."

We pray for those who persecute us because it helps us in turn to love them.

At the end of those verses, Jesus told us to be perfect. Another translation is to be holy. Complete sanctification. (There's a debate among Christians about whether or not it's possible to be completely sanctified in this life. Personally, I believe it is. Jesus told us to be holy by being like him, and if it wasn't possible, I don't think he would have said it. Do I think anyone has ever actually achieved this? No. But the point is to try.) Part of being perfect is reaching the point where, through Jesus Christ, we can love our enemies.


I'm still thinking on this one. Part of the point of this blog is to work out what I'm thinking by writing it down. I'm not saying it's completely theologically or doctrinally sound. But it's where my head is right now. I invite productive discourse. 

2016 Goal

I have at least one goal sort of figured out for this year:

Read 50 books (at least) that are in my apartment as of this moment that I either have not read or merely skimmed or haven't read in a long time. These can be fiction, non-fiction, short, long, whatever, as long as it's currently in my apartment.

I'll review the books on here, like I posted the photos four years ago. I need a name for this goal.

I'll let you ruminate on that. 

Star Wars. Spoilers. Obviously.

I saw the new Star Wars today.

(If you liked it, you may not want to continue reading.)

So back when they announced it, I thought it was a bad idea.

Good for the studio, of course, because they would make a ton of money even if it was terrible.

But bad for everyone who loves Star Wars because there was no way it could live up to the astronomical expectations.

Then the teaser came out. I still thought it was a bad idea. It didn't feel like Star Wars to me.

How is Star Wars supposed to feel?

I can't quantify it. Not fair or helpful, I know. But I was worried then that the people who made the movie would be too blinded by what had gone before to create something new but still wonderful.

Then the full trailer came out. I started to feel hopeful. It reminded me of what I loved about the movies.

Either way, there really wasn't any chance of me NOT seeing this movie. Which I resented because I knew Disney was banking on that and would be tempted to be lazy about actually making a good story.

Anyway. I saw it this morning.

I was really hoping I'd like it.

And there were parts I did like. Rey was cool. Finn was funny, if a little whiny on the order of Luke in A New Hope. BB-8 is adorable. Poe is pretty much The Most Interesting Man in the Universe.

But I didn't like enough of it. They spent an inordinate amount of time on Jakku. I almost laughed out loud the first time Kylo Ren spoke. (And then he took off his helmet and I did laugh. Can you say 'horribly miscast?') I looked at my watch after the first hour trying to figure out why it was taking so long. The Starkiller thing really didn't make sense to me. The plot didn't make sense to me. The ending (and the death) was extremely predictable. There were these long, lingering pauses on characters' faces that were supposed to be significant, but just looked like everyone had gas.

And then I realized that J.J. Abrams had done to Star Wars exactly what he did to Star Trek. It was exactly like the original, but different.

Here's the plot of A New Hope: Rebel leader hides plans in droid to doomsday device. Droid hooks up with desert dweller who is secret Jedi. They escape the planet with the help of a lovable rogue. At some point, a girl is rescued. Secret plans get to the Rebellion. The lovable rogue decides to leave, but ends up fighting for the good guys. The doomsday device has a fatal flaw that can be exploited by a guy in an x-wing. The beloved mentor dies in order to inspire his mentee. The doomsday device explodes inexplicably loudly for being in space.

Here's the plot of The Force Awakens: See above. Same, but different.

I've seen this movie before. I liked it before. I didn't need to see it again.

I understand Hollywood's love of sequels. It's easy to make money on something people are already familiar with.

But I expect a movie to be self-contained. It still has to have a plot that makes sense, and while it can reference what has gone before, I shouldn't need to know all of that to enjoy the movie. There was both too little and too much at the same time. Too little of the good stuff. Too much of the wrong things.

The nostalgia in this one felt cheap. Instead of smiling when the Millennium Falcon appeared, I just thought, "Really? Of all the planets, it happened to be here? That's an awfully big coincidence you're selling."

Same with Han and Leia. And Luke. They are old. And except for Han, they haven't aged well. It took me right out of the movie magic. And seriously, is there no one else in the universe to follow? The inbreeding is a little ridiculous.

Anyway, it felt like JarJar Abrams was saying, "See, I gave you Han Solo and Chewbacca. Now you have to love the new people I created."

The new people who are exactly like the old people. Kylo Ren is Darth Vader lite. Snoke (really?) is an unfathomable version of the Emperor. Hex or whatever is a poor imitation of Tarkin. And what was the purpose of Phasma? She couldn't even pull off Boba Fett levels of cool.

And don't get me started on the barely veiled reference to Hitler.

I really think Harrison Ford is glad he got killed off. He can see where this franchise is headed, and he is jumping ship while his death can still mean something.

Is it time for Captain America: Civil War yet?

(I'm sorry. I didn't hate it. Really I didn't. I just didn't like it.)

Back when I first started funding, I was actually really excited about it. I had enthusiasm, I had drive. I knew academically that it would be hard, but I knew that God was calling me to missions, so it would happen.

At the first church where I spoke, I met with great response. People were interested in what I was doing, and one person in particular offered to head up a prayer team. I had a team of people who promised to pray for me and encourage me and keep me accountable. I counted on that individual to keep things going.

It lasted about two weeks.

Problem is, it took me a couple of months to figure out that things weren't moving. And by that time, there was a distinct lack of enthusiasm.

So my own excitement was cut to the quick.

I need to reignite that passion. I think I'm getting there. But I need your help.